Some days it can be tough for even the strongest, most confident, happy Real Women among us to not slip into the “Why” lament.
This morning at work, like most mornings, I was eating my breakfast at my desk. It consisted of a bowl of fruit, a 100-calorie whole grain breakfast thin, and green tea. I knew lunch would be a salad or a turkey wrap. And I started to wonder two things:
- Is it truly possible to die of food boredom from eating the same healthy things every day?
And more to the point:
2. Why don’t I look like Jennifer Aniston, Cathe Freidrich or Jlo by now?
Of course, deep down I knew the answer to #2. But it took one of my BFF’s to hold up a mirror to me (virtually via email) to turn my own philosophies back on me and make me realize that once again, the answer is because THIS is reality. What celebrities and professional athletes have is something else.
My reality is that today I am in my mid-40’s. Today I will get through another busy day at work. I will take a quick step out mid-afternoon to cruise home to get my son settled in after school so I can come back to work to finish up a couple projects. From there, I will make a dash to the grocery store to buy a few necessities that we need to get through the next few days until I can do a “real” shopping trip. I will then swing home, grab a quick bite with my family, then run off to a meeting at Church for a committee I agreed to be on which at the time of saying “yes” sounded great – although now on a busy rainy day, I am starting to doubt my exuberance. At some point I will return home, hopefully before my son is in bed so I can detox and prepare for the next day which will have similar challenges.
Unfortunately, on days like this, my healthy eating habits will deteriorate by 3pm when I’m hungry and I’ll start grabbing chocolate or popcorn, and my schedule will not allow for a much-needed workout. THIS is my reality, and THIS is why I don’t have the perfect flat stomach, I have bags under my eyes and my hair is unkempt.
As my BFF pointed out, those women I wanted to be this morning “have personal trainers to keep them in shape, personal chefs to keep their diets in control, personal assistants to do all the mundane normal tasks that people like us have to do on a daily basis, and they have personal shoppers and stylists who make sure they are always on the cutting edge and trendy.” (Thank you Rea for these wise words).
True. I don’t have any of those things. But guess what I do have? I have a job that for the most part keeps me close to home so I can have time with my family (vs jetting off to movie shoots in foreign lands for months at a time – and even though that sounds lovely sometimes, it wouldn’t work out well in the long run). I have an amazing support group of Real Women in my life who completely “get it” and can commisserate with each other. I have privacy when I need it, I don’t have paparazzi following and reporting on my every move. I have unconditional love from family and friends who aren’t after my money (what there is of it!). And I have the good chance that my son will not have years of therapy and rehab issues because he is growing up in a stable, fairly “normal” household with both mom and dad present and accounted for.
So when you feel yourself slipping down that slope to the “Why” lament, put your feet out and stop. Don’t ask why you don’t have the perfect body. So what if you have a muffin top? Don’t ask why you don’t have more energy, just accept that you are tired at the end of the day. Don’t ask why you can’t have flawless skin, and learn to accept those new wrinkles you find every week. Don’t ask why you can’t still look and feel like a 20-year old, and instead be proud of your accomplishments.
Why? Because you are Real.
And you ROCK.