There’s very little in life that is guaranteed. Some days, as a matter of fact, it seems that whatever is the opposite of your intended result will be the inevitable outcome. Or, put more simply: Murphy’s Law.
I’m not a big fan of Murphy’s Law, because it is overall a really pessimistic view on life. Yes, sh-t happens. But that doesn’t mean that whatever can go wrong, will. Rather, I think we are surrounded by simple truths, that no matter how hard we try, we can’t always be in control of what happens around us and to us. And in the life of Real Women, there are some fairly tried and true rules that no matter what we do, we are destined to experience them. We all know these truths, yet we all keep plugging along hoping for different consequences. Here are a few examples:
- Whenever you start to put a fitted sheet on a bed, 99% of the time you’ll be trying to put the short end on the long side, or vice versa.
- When you most want to make a great impression, you will have a bad hair day. Yet when you are home all day doing chores, you’ll have a fabulous hair day.
- You will always be the one to replace the toilet paper roll, refill the soap dispenser, and clean up whatever exploded in the microwave.
- On Day 3 of your diet, someone near you will eat a delicious gooey piece of pizza, a chocolately brownie, or a decadent ice cream sundae.
- You will go weeks with no special events in your life, then will suddenly have a series of activities that all conflict on the same date.
- When you are in a hurry or running late, you will be further delayed by a wardrobe malfunction, child or pet incident, traffic jam, or spilled coffee.
- You will be dressed frumpy with messy hair and no makeup when you run into an ex, a work associate, or one of those unreal women who always manage to look amazing.
- Child or pet illnesses will happen between the hours of 2am and 4am.
- Your odds are 80 – 1 that you will walk into a room and forget why, at least once a day. You will remember only after you’ve already turned around and left the room.
- Similarly, you will misplace your glasses, keys, or phone. 75% of the time, the “missing” item is in your hand or in your purse.
- Those new adorable shoes you bought because you just had to have them, the ones that felt great during the try-on in the store, will leave red indents in your feet or give you blisters upon the first wearing.
- When trying to shake down the last of the ketchup, mustard, or salad dressing, a wayward glob will fly out unexpectedly and land on your shirt.
- As you are putting your eye makeup on, a news story or sappy ad will come on tv and make you cry.
- When you feel like you are at capacity level of all that you can handle, something else will be added to your pile.
Yes, we experience all of these things and more, and yet we keep on ticking, responding as needed by cleaning up, cursing, comforting or crying. Because we are strong. We are stubborn. And most importantly, we have my favorite RW Law of all: When we least expect it, but most need it, someone is going to make our lives just a little easier or nicer with a kind word, a helping hand, or good advice…. and it will give us the hope that things will be different.
Like maybe next time we’ll get the fitted sheet going in the right direction on our first try.