Here we are, moving through the days of Christmas and Hanukkah, headed toward a New Year.  Depending upon what, or how, you celebrate the holidays, you could still be knee deep in events and activities.  But for many of us, the days between 12/25 and 1/1 are a unique combination of wrap-up and gear-up.  

I’ve never been a big fan of “The Year in Review.”  I tend to scroll by, or ignore, the recaps that get fed to us via social streams and newscasters who apparently have nothing else to report on.  I don’t particularly care about which music everyone listened to the most, what food trends emerged, how many babies were named Liam or which tiktok trends got the most followers.  And I really don’t care to relive any tragedies, thank you very much.  Sure, I may have moments of quiet retrospection, but for the most part, I don’t need to have everything we lived through in the past 365 days regurgitated to me.

I rather like these “in between” days.  My holiday décor is still up, in honor of the twelve days of Christmas and our journey to Epiphany. But the crazy hustle and bustle has died down.  I use these days to quietly regroup, to breathe, and start to methodically get ready for whatever is coming next – both personally and professionally.  Rather than dwell on what the ups and downs have been over the past many months, I spend time being thankful for them.  Because every moment, every hill and valley, has brought me to where I am today. And where I am is alive and well, with another year’s worth of memories. As a matter of fact, today it led me to a beautiful winter hilltop view on a hike with my dogs. Good place for pondering.

I’m also not a big proponent of setting New Year Resolutions.  The majority of us have spent every day of the past year trying to be the best we can be and do the best we can do.  Whether that is striving to be the best mom, best sibling, best friend, or hardest worker, there aren’t a lot of days that we have not already set high expectations of ourselves.  And let’s be honest, sometimes doing our best is just trying to get through a day.  So why for heaven’s sake should we now say “yeah, ok, but I gotta do better, that wasn’t good enough”?   Why must we think it necessary to resolve to lose 20 pounds, get a better job, become a better cook, or overall be an even better version of ourselves? Do we really have to add more Must Do’s to our lives?  The definition of resolution is “an official decision that is made”.   The definition of resolute is “purposeful, determined and unwavering.”  Dang. None of that sounds like we can cut ourselves any slack.

How about instead we think about some goals for the year ahead?  Goals are something we shoot for, not something that sounds as harsh and demanding as a resolution.  Definition:  A goal is the object of a person’s ambition or effort, an aim or desired result.   If a goal is not met, then we can pivot, change or try again.  And here’s good news.  A goal can be as simple as getting up and moving every day.  Make someone else smile.  Take on a new hobby.  It does not have to be to climb a mountain or become a firefighter and run into burning buildings to save other humans.

I’ve heard recommendations that if one writes down their goals, or tells another person about them, then they are much more apt to reach them. Ok, sure..  but if doing that causes you more anxiety or stress, don’t do it.  Just thinking about them is enough.  We don’t ever have to share what our personal goals are if we don’t want to.   Looky there, now we can add empowerment to our ambitions.

I have a milestone birthday coming up this year.  With that comes of course some added retrospection and future focus.  I find that my personal goals have shifted.  I no longer feel the overwhelming need for character building and personal improvement – that is certainly not due to any warped view that I am perfect – merely that at this stage of life, to quote Popeye, “I am what I am.”   The goals that are floating around in my head during these in-between days have more to do with finding ways to slow down, fit in more self- care and writing time, and spend as much time as possible with loved ones enjoying the wonder and beauty of our world. There is so much turmoil, angst, stress and fear in the world, my aim is to be aware but put my energies elsewhere.

That’s it so far.  No big resolutions to lose my muffin top tummy (it’s a permanent part of me now), run a marathon (my knees and I both hate running), change careers (sounds exhausting) or even get more sleep (ain’t gonna happen). 

What do you say, will you join me in being just a bit LESS resolute, pause to take a breather, appreciate who you are now (that person is fabulous btw), and just take some time to BE without heaping yet more on our already full plates?   

No matter whether you are in full-on celebration mode or are moving slowly through the in-between days, enjoy.  Be kind to yourself.  And Happy New Year.  (No pressure).