I’ve been hesitant to do any blog writing recently, because it seems there is only one topic any of us are able discuss. It begins with P and ends in -ic. It has consumed us in more ways than one, and every one of us, everywhere, is somehow affected by and attempting to deal with the -ic. To be honest, I’m completely weary of thinking about, talking about, and coping with the -ic. So I’ve been avoiding writing. Which is not the right answer.
I will also admit that for the past two days I have willingly been the proverbial ostrich with her head in the sand. I have not read, listened to, or watched any news. It’s not that I don’t care, or that I don’t feel the importance of what is going on around us. But for my own sanity, I needed a break. I think we all need to take breaks from time to time to be able to recharge our coping mechanisms.
As part of this break, the only social media content and information I’ve read are positive posts. I have scrolled past anything sad, frightening or worrisome. And guess what, the longer we go in this -ic situation, the more positive bits I’m finding. There are so many people out there sewing masks, delivering groceries, raising donations, and showing up at appropriate distances to show support for those on the front lines, it warms the soul and gives hope.
I am one of the very fortunate ones who is not only healthy (knock on wood), but still employed (please knock again), working from home. I am beyond thankful for both of those key points. However, because I am still working 9+ hours a day, I feel limited in how much I can do to help others. This is why I jumped at the chance to do one tiny simple thing for a friend. She asked if I could hem her scrubs. You see she is a pretty amazing Doctor who is still going every day to a medical facility. She is one of many other essential and incredible humans out there who risk facing the -ic up close every day while I stay safe and albeit stir crazy in my home.
The funny thing is my sewing skills are rusty. But I uncovered ye ol’ sewing machine, was all proud of myself when I remembered not only how to thread the machine but wind a bobbin, and got the scrubs hemmed so my BFF hero can avoid tripping and falling on the job. Did the hems look great? No. Luckily, they are scrubs. If my sister, who is still a fabulous seamstress, saw my project, she would give me the one-lifted brow that says “really? You learned better than that.” Then would giggle at me.
As I did my measuring, pinning, cutting, stitching and ironing, I thought about the ways we are all resurrecting lost skills in this time of the -ic. One trip to a grocery store (with disposable gloves and masks in place) will lead us to believe that a lot of us are cooking and baking far more than usual. We are picking up actual pens and hand-writing letters and cards to those who need a boost. There are young mothers re-learning how to use cloth diapers. We are cleaning with washable rags to save paper towels. We are tackling home projects like painting and carpentry. We are having family game nights and going for hikes. We are playing music to lift spirits. We are making gifts, and calling people to actually talk vs. texting. Lost talents and skills, newly found. And it’s kinda wonderful.
There is no denying that the -ic is overwhelming and we can easily let it get all-consuming. When we don’t take occasional moments to let ourselves regroup and breathe, everything feels huge and impossible to conquer. Yet when we let ourselves think about something else – even for a few hours – we remember that we have skills that have laid a bit dormant during the rush of “normal” life. Perhaps we can find small little things to help each other fight back against the -ic beast. And feel better in the process.
By the way, did you know that the myth of the ostrich hiding her head in the sand came about because she’s actually tending to her eggs in her ground nest? So she’s not really hiding and avoiding the world. She’s doing one very skilled, tiny little thing to make her world better.
We are women. Many of us are also moms, grandmas, aunts, guardians, and caregivers. It is in our DNA to protect and to worry, while at least attempting to show outwardly that we are calm and in control at all times. In other words, we are well-trained for this current global crisis.
During this morning’s walk, my puppy and I passed a home where there was much activity in the driveway. Clearly a family was packing up for a trip. It appeared to be at least one or two families, plus grandparents. Two vehicles were being filled with bags and skiis, so I can only assume it was a weekend outing to perhaps NH, VT, or Maine. On our return route past the home again, they had reached the end phase of the preparation for departure. Young children – I counted at least four – were being herded out to the cars. As the kids circled the vehicles vying for their best seat locations, one excited young voice was repeating what I’m sure he’d heard several times inside the house “Everyone carry your own water bottle!” I saw a mom walking towards a car with her arms loaded with the last round of items, as a dad was pulling a car seat out of a different car parked further up the drive. I caught his eye, he waved, and I called out “Have fun!”
“I’m tired.” Two words uttered as frequently as Love You, I’m Hungry, and What’s Up. Let’s face it, we are beings who rarely feel rested and refreshed. And when we do, it is short lived. Most of us can probably count on one hand the number of times in the past year we woke up feeling energized and rarin’ to go. And yet we continue on as if that is normal, swallowing down caffeine and using concealer for our under-eye bags.
Anytime we put a lot of time, money, skill or energy into something, we naturally want to reap the rewards and satisfaction of our efforts. We want our work to be noticed, appreciated, or admired. We lose 20 pounds, we are thrilled when someone notices. We do a major renovation on the house, or a new paint job in a room, we hope someone will ooh and ahh. We buy a new fabulous outfit or shoes, we wear them with pride and wait for someone to notice. Get a new hair cut or style, and someone is bound to toss out a compliment. We toil through a major project at work or school or in a community group, and we love to see it all come together or hear a “nice job” or thank you. Even if we are doing some anonymous community or charity work, it still feels great to see our efforts benefit someone else.
Decisions, decisions, decisions. We all love having a lot of options to choose from, and in this land of excess, we have options galore. In all areas of our lives. Yet I can’t help but wonder sometimes if we’ve gone a bit overboard. Especially in restaurants.
Every time I turn on a news program or wade through my social media feeds, I’m bombarded by contradictory messages. The world is falling apart from politics, military threats, horrendous wild fires, and hate crimes. But woo-hoo, it’s a new year and a new decade, time to eat better, exercise more, get healthier, volunteer more, and be your best self (thanks Oprah).
Earlier this week the morning windchill was -10◦ so my puppy and I missed our morning walk. She was all out of sorts, pacing and whining. I felt a bit off too. I’m fortunate that my work days start late enough that every morning I can fit in a 30-minute outing with her after sunrise. Since she became a part of our family seven months ago, we have missed very few mornings –only due to a change in my schedule (an early morning meeting or travel) or for extreme weather conditions – torrential rain, massive snow storm, or like that morning, dangerously cold temps. Otherwise we are out there every day, checking out the neighborhood, doing one of three available routes from our house.
I opened today’s door on my Advent Calendar, because I’ve had a December count-down calendar all my life. I asked my husband to hang the mistletoe ball in the doorway because that’s where it goes. Tomorrow I’ll bake peanut butter blossoms and raspberry ribbon cookies because they are a family requirement. I’ve hidden the pickle ornament on the tree and will get the extra surprise gift ready, because we always do the pickle present. I added an antique angel to my creche because it was my mom’s. I’ll polish and wear my silver angel necklace for Christmas Eve Service because she always goes to that mass with me. Because, because, because – they are traditions.
Real Women 